Sunroom
Start with what you can help with
Try: “Your purse is missing. Let’s look together.” That offers a next step without agreeing that someone stole it. You do not need to settle an argument before helping look for a missing possession.
Acknowledge the worry
“That sounds upsetting” can recognize the feeling. Keep your reply simple, and avoid a long defense of your intentions. This is a suggested phrase, not a guarantee that the person will feel reassured immediately.
Offer one place to look
“Shall we check beside your chair?” is a concrete invitation. Search together without making the person reconstruct every step of their day. Check familiar places and anywhere the item may have been put for safekeeping.
Give frequently misplaced things a familiar place
Try a visible, consistent spot for a purse or wallet. For an inexpensive item that often goes missing, a spare may be useful. Choose changes that fit the person’s habits, and involve them where possible.
Take the concern seriously
Do not dismiss a report of theft just because the person has dementia. Check the circumstances. If you find evidence that belongings or money are being taken, seek appropriate help. Tell the care team about new or worsening suspicions. A sudden change in confusion or behavior needs prompt medical attention.
Your feelings matter, too
Being accused still hurts. You can offer a gentle response and feel wounded afterward. Consider asking someone you trust to listen or share the caring responsibilities. Understanding the situation does not mean you have to carry it alone.
For education, not medical advice. Adapt these suggestions to the person and talk with their care team about concerns.
Sources and approach
Written by Sunroom using the caregiver guidance below. Suggested phrases are examples to adapt, not promises of a particular response. This article has not been clinically reviewed.
